It's the moment we've waited for this entire wash of a season: Khloe arrived.
However, we weren't given enough time with the married old gal to measure how much we've missed her. The producers thought it would be a great idea to devote half the 22 minutes to Scott, who had landed himself the May cover of Men's Fitness (whyyyy?).
The remainder focused on Kim's sour puss, a result of the lollipops-and-gummi bears relationship between her oldest and youngest sisters. This isn't a shock, as we've seen Kourtney and Khloe play odd-man-out with Kim for the past four years.
As one of three girls, I'll admit this happens from time to time. But it's clear that the producers were searching for a storyline and know how well Khloe and Kourtney's dynamic is received by the viewers. Tough break, Kimmy. Call up Kris.
She'll hang with you. Scott Disick would do it, but he's too busy dreaming of his Men's Fitness wardrobe. Gucci and Tom Ford and fast cars, oh my!
I spent the first ten minutes gagging thanks to Scott. He saunters into the suite and tells his beloved that Men's Fitness has selected him for their May cover.
Then the jabs begin (even more reason to love Kourtney): Scott doesn't work out, why would they pick him... that sort of thing.
It was great. And yet, none of these insults seemed to bother Scott. He explained to his audience that he's "very busy usually working on corporate stuff."
Doing corporate stuff takes up A LOT of one's time, especially if they're having trouble defining said corporate stuff. Well, with all of this newfound fame and corporate responsibility, it was high time for Scott to hire an assistant. Enter Dale.
Poor Dale wore running socks with dress shoes and sported a goatee. Scott made Dale lose both. The next day said assistant saunters in looking like the second coming of Scott Disick.
A face made for radio the Men's Fitness cover.
Since Scott's never had any real power, he mishandles it in the truest sense of the word. Scott believes in treating people like dung and once their spirit is broken, then it's time to ease up a smidge. Methinks Dale was called in by the producers for a potential gig, but was prepped that this would be used as footage for an ailing series.
Dale was probably up for the challenge of being Disick's assistant, but once things went sour at the Mens Fitness shoot, Dale headed for greener pastures.
It was an unprofessional parting on both sides. Scott is an idiot who has no idea how to manage properly, and Dale took his union check for 13 minutes of airtime, shouting "I quit" over his shoulder to Scott. After a pep talk from Saddy-Cakes Kim, Scott decided to give Dale another try.
Oooh no you don't, says Dale (a bit more crassly). He calls Scott an a$$hole, and walks out. Always one to turn a negative into positive, Scott pats himself on the back for giving Dale a pair of balls. Everybody wins!
After an episode of attitude and moping, Kim confides to her new pal that things between the sisters are tense because Khloe and Kourtney like each other more than they like Kim. Not so, says Scott. Yes so, say the viewers.
Khloe and Kourtney totally like one another more than they like Kim. Buuut the episode is wrapping up and we have to find a way for everyone to get along. So make up or be forced into another season in New York, hiss the producers.
Fine, bitch the sisters three.
Padma Lakshmi Paige Butcher Pamela Anderson Paris Hilton Patricia Vel·squez Paula GarcĂs
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